Sex Talks

Just like Tuesday's post , I have not in any way been paid to write about this product, though that will be abundantly clear once you start reading... On Monday I got an e-mail from Geanna. Subject line: Please write about this... Body of text: http://gothamist.com/2013/02/ 26/terrible_disney_game_teach_ young_ny.php I have been both thanking and cursing Geanna ever since. The gist of the article from Gothamist is this: A new Disney game promises to be a new kind of spirit guide, simulating the New York City experience for each player, giving tips on how to "climb the social ladder and make your dreams come true!" The program will also strip away your authenticity and uniqueness and transform you from "country bumpkin to glamour girl." There's also this important element: Disney City Girl 's players are mostly 20 to 29-year-old women�and a rep explains, "This is an adult game�the language, the storyline, the mission of the career progressi...

Note: I am not in any way affiliated with Jillian Michaels , nor have I been paid to write this post. I am just a good Samaritan who didn't have anything else to write about today. I don't like to exercise because it is hard, and I hate the way my hair looks when I sweat. That said, I recently picked up my very dusty Jillian Michaels 30-Day Shred DVD because I really want to get back into doing ballet, but I'm not in good enough shape to start. Yes, this is the exercise equivalent of cleaning your house before the maid comes, but we all do that too, so whatever. My history with and knowledge of how to properly exercise is limited. Literally, if I could find my Mom's old VHS of the Jane Fonda work-out and transfer it to DVD, I'd do that for the rest of my life. Actually, forget the transfer. I'd buy a VHS player for that. But, alas, Jane is stuck in the '90s and Billy Blanks' Tae Bo system is too expensive. So, "TV's toughest trainer" is it...

I'm delayed in posting this because it didn't turn out quite like it was expected. I made my Baked Brie-st of the Southern Wild . I cut many different sizes and shapes of brie cheeses into the shape of a giant boar. I wrapped that boar shape in way too much Pillsbury crescent roll dough. I added the features of the animal in 3-D using even more Pillsbury crescent roll. Then I created "fur" along the entire thing using a paring knife. Here is proof of that really ridiculous process: Please note just how well it fits in with the actual scene from the movie! I intended to place this image (that I downloaded, formatted, and printed, ehem...) next to my dish once it was cooked.  But, sadly, the oven at the house where we watched the Oscar was having a bad day, and by bad day I mean it never got over 200 degrees sooo the brie cooked on the inside, but the dough stayed raw. Oscar pun dish FAIL. Frankly, I had a feeling I was flying too close to the sun on this one... Lucki...

On account of the fact that I won last year's Oscar pool by a landslide (thank you Pete Hammond at Deadline ) and could not think of anything else to write today, I'm publishing my 2013 Oscar picks. It will come as no surprise to you that I ABSOLUTELY LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT the Oscars. It will also come as no surprise to you that I attend a party in which you have to bring a food item related to an Oscar nominee. Every single year I make my mom's famous baked brie and then shove it into a pun. 2011 was Baked Jeff Brie-dges in the shape of his TRUE GRIT character, 2012 was Baked Brie of Life in the shape of that tree from that weird Terrence Malick movie, and this year I will be making Brie-sts of the Southern Wild : a baked brie in the shape of one of those boars from my favorite film of the year. Yes, I'll post a picture on Sunday night. Now, without further digression, my 2013 Oscar Picks, including explanation. For reference, here is the full list of nominees : --...

Over the past three months, seven people that I personally know have gotten engaged. Prior to these past three months, I hadn't even been to seven weddings. It is completely out of control. Not that I didn't expect this exact mass influx of engagements to strike right around the time of my 30th birthday. I've been anticipating it for the whole of my late 20s. Every "older" person I know has warned that the tidal wave begins around 27 and doesn't stop until roughly 35. I'm not surprised by these engagements. I'm also not surprised that people of this (my) age range want to get married. It's time for all that family planning, settling down, forming roots stuff, generally speaking. Yes, there's a whole other conversation about why it's time (part biological clock, part I'm-too-tired-for-this-wild-20s-crap, in my opinion), and yes, it is only time for some people, but bottom line: the next phase of life has begun. My question is how all th...

It is Valentine's Day, and so I feel inclined to share a little something I've learned about love. This, like so many love lessons, is one I'm embarrassed to admit that I didn't understand for a very long time. Actually, it's worse than that, I didn't even know that I didn't understand it. I didn't know it was missing from my knowledge base at all. It's like I was functioning under the assumption that the sky is blue, and then somebody came along and showed me it was actually whatever color you see. I had under -thought it (yes, me), but thankfully I met someone who thinks three steps ahead (yes, R).  We were sitting on the bed in my old room on La Jolla sometime around our second official month of dating (which could be anywhere from June of '10 to January of '11, depending on which of us you ask). I was reacting to some frustrating scheduling problem. All I remember is that one of us was being inconvenienced by the plans of the other. I...

Last week R and I hosted my cousin Derek for his week-long L.A. adventure. Derek was most recently in Seoul, Korea where he taught English and did voice over work. He decided to stop in L.A. on his way home to the East coast to get a feel for the city. A few things you should know: R and I love hosting people. I think it's because we're both super competitive so we want people to think L.A. is an amazing place (which it obviously is).  R and I live in a one bedroom. It's a big one bedroom, but there's still only just the one bedroom making for a total of three rooms in the entire place (bed, bath, living/kitchen). Derek is younger than us. I am the oldest of four children, girl children while R has two older sisters Korea is VERY different from L.A. Onto the theory: hosting a guest in your home is like a mini preview of your eventual parenting styles. I, for example, wanted to ensure that Derek was cared for every minute of every day. R preferred to allow Derek to, shal...

Today is my half birthday! That's what I yelled in R's face around 7AM, one second after my alarm went off. Then I said, "Don't worry, I won't go nuts and buy myself any special clothes or anything," and he looked at me like, yeah right . I don't usually celebrate half birthdays, but for reasons I've now written about extensively , this one seems like it's worth celebrating. It's exciting. It's motivating. It's the exact subject (and title) of the screenplay I'm currently in the middle of writing. (Write what you know?) And so I had been planning to format this super exciting post as a collection of things I'd like to do before I turn 30. I thought that would be a fun way "check list" through the next six months before the big 3-0. Then I sat down to write the list, and it was really weird. I haven't decided if that's because I've A. lived quite a bit already B. don't need to do things for the sake of ...

( thank you Celine Geiger for today's blog inspiration) Thursday is my 1/2 birthday, specifically the last 1/2 birthday before I turn 30. So six months from this Thursday, my 20s will be over. Thank god it'll be in the 70s and sunny when this will happens upon me.  I am working on figuring out my feelings about this fairly momentous milestone, but in the meantime I wanted to share the thoughts of one 30-something and one mid 20-something on what turning the big 3-0 A. feels like and B. means. The chain starts with a post from blogger Citizen Kerry (who is roughly 35) called 10 Reasons You Could Not Pay Me To Be 20 Again, If That Were Somehow Possible.  It's an awesome post in and of itself (Her number 1 reason: "I have hobbies besides drama" - hahaha), but what really resonated with me was actually a comment to CK's post from a blogger named Young Manhattanite . YM writes: "Krucoff told me I�m supposed to write an actual thing in response to this , p...